The Surprising Secret Ingredient That Consistently Facilitates Healing

The Surprising Secret IngredientNPA embraces and expresses one of my favourite paradoxes in the realm of healing, transformation, consciousness and love.

In this Musing on NPA & Life I want to lay it out for you, and give you an insight into, what I have come to understand is, THE biggest gift you can bring to any healing or facilitation situation.

“I’m Very Grateful”

This week I received an email from a client who wanted to express the gratitude she felt for the sessions we have been having, and offer a testimonial to share with others what she felt she experienced with me and how it has helped her.

The clue to the ‘secret ingredient’ is in here, so have a read and I’ll break it down for you after…

“Working with Joel I have been surprised by, and so appreciated, the tender compassion and acceptance that he has brought to each session. He offered a genuine loving space with no judgement; even of feelings I had previously felt sooo ashamed of.

In the past I have experienced a certain level of acceptance with facilitators but when change hasn’t come or stuckness has shown up, the focus on ‘moving on’ or changing has taken over.

Joel’s approach has the flavour of open-handed compassion and shows a level of acceptance which feels as if it comes very naturally from him. For me though, it was a very new experience and I feel that those qualities have been key to me moving on as I have.  Those more tender/”dark”/”stuck” feelings, having been offered all the time and space they needed to feel safe and relax, let down their defences and change of their own accord.

Here I am a few months later finding myself in a more peaceful and happy place! Feeling more able to deal with life, with more space and compassion now coming from within me! yeah!! I’m very grateful.”

Jane Griffin, Leicester, UK

The Secret Ingredient

So what was Jane experiencing ‘coming naturally from me’? She states; compassion, acceptance, genuine loving space, no judgement. These are qualities which naturally arise from the secret ingredient but are not the secret ingredient itself.

The thing I love most about NPA; the thing that practising it has trained into me, into my approach to working with clients and into my life in general is it’s agenda-less-ness. OK, so that’s not, strictly speaking, a real word but it points to the fact that NPA, in it’s pure form, comes with no agenda. And having NO agenda IS the secret ingredient.

And there-in lies the paradox, and the challenge for many a would-be power-user of NPA, and many a fine transformational practitioner. The question goes: “Surely if someone is paying me money to get some kind of outcome or result – shouldn’t I be doing everything in my power to get them there? Or at least to help them get themselves there!!??”

The trouble is, all that “I, me, them, their, there” stuff is based on personal power. Personal power requires a person. Persons come with an agenda. Agenda’s come with timelines, outcomes, comparisons, judgements, intentions… that leads to right ways and wrong ways both overt and covert… that leads to dogma and dogma leads to blindness… I think you get the idea.

NPA invites you to:

  • Express yourself in your natural way.
  • To say a few simple lines.
  • To notice what happens (if anything).

That’s it. No agenda.

So How Does That Consistently Facilitate Healing?

Let’s break it down

The Problem with AgendasThe problem with agendas – even ones with positive intent, even subtle energetic easily self-deniable ones – is that they apply pressure towards the intended outcome or route. Pressure tends to invoke resistance, resistance leads to persistence and before you know it you’re in a world of friction and potential stuckness. That can lead to further pressure in support of the agenda and so begins an un-helpful loop.

Jane illustrates it when she says, “In the past I have experienced a certain level of acceptance with facilitators” – in other words, there was an agenda with the facilitator, and she goes on to say how the agenda kicks up a gear, “but when change hasn’t come or stuckness has shown up, the focus on ‘moving on’ or changing has taken over.”

As you train more in the art of using NPA, you’ll begin to appreciate the importance and power of it’s agenda-less-ness. The power in NPA is NON-personal; as you get out of the way (drop the agenda) things begin to resolve all by themselves… in wonderful, effortless and sometimes miraculous ways.

Working agenda-less-ly with Jane meant that we met in a state of mutual, gentle discovery. It was like watching a flower blossom… and how personally are you involved in that process?

As Jane put it, “Those more tender/”dark”/”stuck” feelings, having been offered all the time and space they needed to feel safe and relax, let down their defences and change of their own accord.”

They (the feelings) let down their defences and changed of their own accord… And THAT is how having no agenda consistently facilitates healing, transformation, evolutions in consciousness and love.

Let It Come Alive

I have found that people who bathe themselves in the non-personal perspective at The NPA Expansive Weekend and beyond, find that it naturally comes alive in them, and with that dogma’s and agenda’s fall away. They still, of course, are available to passing intentions, outcome notions and the like, but rather than wearing them as uniform, they are passing fancy dress outfits that serve to raise a smile, warm the heart, lift a weight, disarm or arm; they come, and are used when useful and kind, and are discarded effortlessly as the truth of the moment dictates.

In the end it comes down to this, “Less ‘you-who-knows’ and more ‘Life-will-show’, invites the magic moment”

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 Tweetables:

“Having NO agenda IS the secret ingredient” via @JoelYoungNPA 

“Dogma leads to blindness” via @JoelYoungNPA 

“NPA invites you to express yourself in your natural way” via @JoelYoungNPA 

“The problem with agendas is that they apply pressure towards the intended outcome or route” via @JoelYoungNPA

“As YOU get out of the way, things begin to resolve all by themselves” via @JoelYoungNPA

“We met in a state of mutual, gentle discovery. It was like watching a flower blossom…” via @JoelYoungNPA

“Having no agenda consistently facilitates healing, transformation, evolutions in consciousness and love” via @JoelYoungNPA

“Less ‘you-who-knows’ and more ‘Life-will-show’, invites the magic moment” via @JoelYoungNPA

Are You An Intensively Farmed Spiritual Chicken?

Are You An Intensively Farmed Spiritual Chicken?OK. So that might seem like an odd question to ask you, but here’s the thing:

Forcing your personal growth or Spiritual evolution is like pumping chickens full of growth hormones…

If you don’t believe in pumping chickens full of growth hormones or farming vegetables through artificial growth processes, and yet find yourself cracking the whip on yourself in the name of healing, personal growth or spiritual progress then I invite you to take a gentle look at the energetic environment you’re hanging out in.

Disregard For Natural Order

It’s the same consciousness that engages that behaviour in both situations. It comes from the belief that pushing hard and forcing things beyond their natural pace pays dividends. And perhaps also the fear that NOT pushing means no growth at all.

In both cases it can seem to achieve what you want in the short term and yet, the unkindness and disregard for natural order inevitably makes it unsustainable. At some point a backlash needs to happen. To put that another way… Nature asserts itself eventually.

Plus, chances are, the road of Force is a hard and fun-less journey for all involved!

Let Yourself Be

Let yourself be, and you’ll begin to connect to the natural rhythm of life, which offers smooth steady evolution AND exciting effortless growth spurts, all in joyful harmony.

I’d love to get your comments and have you share this blog. And if you do share, then you’ll unlock some extra content: “Cluck or Yuk -  Six Choice Checks for Spiritual Chicks” (Including man-chicks. I’m going with aliteration over gender vernacular and demographic accuracy)

Have a Natural Day – Joel x

 

Joel Young
http://www.NonPersonalAwareness.com/

Comments, shares and likes welcome!

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Do You Need A Hug?

Do You Need A Hug?If you tend to rationalise the crap out of feeling alone, well I understand.

Especially on ‘Saint bloody Valentines day’…

Maybe you question why you haven’t got that special someone with you and berate yourself with some bugger’s reason why you should have.

Perhaps you rage at the vulgarity of Valentines commercialism and scorn the couple’s who fell for it; displaying their loved up life on Facebook like a badge of honour. Perhaps you quietly, secretly, wish them a nasty break up.

Perhaps you hide your heart in the Haagen-Dazs pot – cookies and silent scream.

These are culturally acceptable strategies for dealing with feeling alone. They are seriously rubbish and usually serve to make you feel worse.

Here’s the thing. You need a hug.

(And, by the way, the same goes for Christmas, New Years, Birthday’s and all those traditionally ‘social’ occasions…)

You Need A Hug

And I’m not talking about one of those civilized, love & light, bromance kinda hugs you see happening everywhere these days – although I’ve gotta say I’m all for them over a hand shake, an air kiss or an awkward stand-off.

No, I’m talking about one of those uncompromising, unhindered, full out, full on, ‘I’m totally f***ing here – this moment is. my. everything.’ kinda hugs. A hug that says everything you ever wanted to hear without a single word being said. A hug that has exactly nothing to do with sex or orgasms and yet gives every cell in your body the deepest permission to sing and cry and laugh and scream in one dizzy, crazy, out-of-control yet safely held moment. A hug that says yes to everything you are, everything you’ve been and everything you long to become.

THAT, dear reader, is the hug I’m talking about.

The Big Question

And here’s the big question: Can you feel it? As you read the description of the hug – did you feel it? Can you go there? Can you LET yourself touch into it?

Because, while it’s flippin’ wonderful to get that from someone else, the truth is there are parts of you that are looking for THAT kind of hug from you, and only you. In the same way that sometimes toddlers just need their Mum, and no one else will do – not even Daddy. This can be true whether you are in a wonderful relationship, a crappy relationship or no relationship. Sometimes you’ve just gotta get in there and hug yourself!

A Deep, Out-Of-Control, Yet Safely Held Moment

This week I worked with a client in his 30’s who had undergone a very traumatic event when he was 18. Out of the experience a great deal of positive inner searching, personal and spiritual growth had come and yet he, his 18 year old traumatised consciousness, was still somehow alone and locked down. For all the work he’d done and help he’d got, this inner kid needed to feel it. He needed to down-to-his-bones know: he wasn’t alone anymore. He needed THAT kind of hug.

And no, I didn’t give him that hug. I simply helped him to realise the man he’d become was the one that his 18 year old self was looking for. And helped him to realise that the man he’d become was ready; that all that he’d been through, all that he’d been inspired to learned and all the ways that he’d grown meant he could finally meet his younger self, hold him and give him THAT kind of hug.

It was indeed a deep, out-of-control yet safely held moment. And although he hardly moved a muscle – it was a deeply physical experience and the key that unlocked his long held defences and set him on the road to outward fulfilment.

Your Turn

So, if you’re alone this Valentines, or at any time – whether you’re single or in a relationship but not getting that hug – perhaps it’s you you’re looking for – and you wont settle for less. If you can even begin to connect emotionally with my description of ‘THAT kind of hug’ or it points you to your own description that you can connect with then you’ve gone a long way to finding the perfect love today.

If you wanna go for it, then…

I invite you to imagine there’s a younger self that’s looking for THAT kind of hug today. It doesn’t matter how old she or he is – whatever age ‘you’, shows up in your sense or imagination is perfect. And if there are many – form a queue – there’s plenty of hugs to go around, and just pick one for now.

Once you have a sense of them, just feel, sense or see yourself go over to them and connect. You’re ready, so just take them in your arms and give them THAT kind of hug. If it helps to re-read my description – great, do that. Or simply feel your way through it organically – you know what they need. You know what you need. Hug it out.

And if you would like help with that, you know where I am.

This is my Universal hug for you this fine day, and I hope it touches your heart and makes your world a little brighter.

Please share the hugging love and let me know what you experienced in the comments.

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Joel Young on Soul To Profit Radio with Jaden Sterling

Joel Young on Soul To Profit Radio with Jaden SterlingI was delighted to be invited onto Jaden Sterling’s much loved ‘Soul to Profit’ radio show back in October 2013, and hope you enjoy it here!

Simply use the embedded player below to listen to the show ♥

 

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The Human Is Not Outside Of Nature

The Human Is Not Outside Of NatureIn the name of connection (and with the noble intent of promoting more sustainable behaviours) it is often claimed that the human race is outside of nature or acting counter to the laws of nature.

The uncomfortable truth is that Humans are absolutely PART of nature. Nature, like us, expresses many apparent contradictions…

Creation: both wondrous and banal
Destruction: both incomprehensibly devastating and of obvious mechanical necessity
Life: both abundant and finite
Nurture and neglect. The fertile and the baron. Endless consumers and Eco-savvy contributors… The list goes on.

We Are Part Of Natures System

The fact is, we are PART of nature’s system. Part of nature’s grander intelligence. At the behest of ‘her’ eonic plans.

What we claim ourself to be doesn’t change the truth at a larger level, it simply colours local subjective experience.

Unfortunately, claiming ourself to be divorced from, separate to or outside of nature gives rise to delusional experiences, self judgement and unnecessary suffering. And these are  not states in which wholesome decisions are made or in which higher objectives are easily reached.

Better that we remember that The Human is not outside of Nature, join with a wider truth and experience reconnection. For every man-volcano that flattens large swathes of forest and arbitrarily kills animals en masse, there are trillions of lichen spores ready to begin the process of renewal and the enrichment of that land.

Just To Be Crystal Clear…

Just to be crystal clear, I’m not suggesting for a moment that we become passive in the face of our impulses to change our behaviour and environmental conduct – rather I am encouraging those *with* that impulse to become even more wholesome and aligned as they go passionately about acting on it.

In the end, Nature will have its way, and we, right now are part of that.

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Don’t Mistake An Option For A Necessity

Option NecessityOften-times in the world of healing and personal growth you may be told, or have it implied, that a particular set of conditions must be met, a certain route must be taken or a specific approach or method is the only “real” way to heal or shift your life.

A classic example is the idea that we must resolve painful experiences from the past in order to be free for a better future. While that may be a truly powerful ‘vehicle’ for the shift that suits the reality constructs of millions, there are also millions who have made, and will make, equivalent shifts with no need to recourse to their personal history.

“A” Way, Not “THE” Way

While I offer the non-personal perspective with passion and a heartfelt beleif in its potential value to those that connect with it, I am always keen to say that NPA is “A” way, not “THE” way.

It is my view that a key gift of this Human life experience is variety – many possible routes to every outcome. There are always options and in a world still full of dictatorial expressions it boils down to this:

“Don’t mistake an option for a necessity.”

Joel Young
NonPersonalAwareness.com

SHARING IS OPTIONAL (& very much appreciated) ;0)

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Bad News For Control Freaks

Bad News For Control FreaksEnlightened Masters, Quantum Physicists & Brain Researches agree that fundamentally there’s no personal causality & every perceived reality is entirely at consequence to God/The Field/The Subconscious.

Now, I’m not sure if the brain researches (who use that ‘subconscious’ label) have quite caught onto the fact that the subconscious is an aspect of the very NON-local field, however they ARE very clear that the conscious ‘you’ is basically the last to know what the heck you’re thinking/feeling/doing.

Of course, when you really let this in, it seems to put a lot of our currently fashionable ideas that our beliefs/emotions/behaviours are at CAUSE (and therefore the point of power for manifesting, healing etc etc) up the creek along with the control freaks.

Who Is The Source?

After all, who or what is the source of these beliefs? Who or what is the source even of the inspirations to do yukky or yummy things with them? Turns out, it certainly isn’t ‘you’. Oh Crikey!

Discovering that you have no control whatsoever, at any level can be pretty devastating to both the average and the awesome personality.

Fortunately, at the time when these notions are sinking inexorably into humanities collective awareness, a perspective has also come along that somehow, effortlessly puts all these apparent paradoxes, questions and old romantic notions of control into some kind of digestible wholesomeness.

This perspective is called ‘Non-Personal Awareness’ and it is both kind AND useful to the human condition.

It even comes with a handy tool kit to help the modern human brain shift gears, and actually experience delight in these very modern realisations.

You can discover NPA and Non-Personal Awareness here:
www.NonPersonalAwareness.com

Please SHARE this if it touches you on some way

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