Open your heart to this return from The Black Eyed Peas, re-imagining their song “Where is the love”…
AND remember that letting your Soul and heart be true and filled with love in service to yourself and all of humanity…
â€¢ DOESN’T mean being passive…
â€¢ DOESN’T mean using the spiritual concept of ‘boundless love’ as an avoidance of the raw truth of your humanity in the 21st century and
â€¢ DOESN’T mean plastering over your shadow with false positivity and denying your darker emotions
And it absolutely…
â€¢ DOES include speaking up and making your voice heard in the things that matter to you (this video is a great example of that… viva the love-revolution!)
â€¢ DOES include maintaining healthy boundaries for you… Standing behind your beautiful self with love and strength when they are transgressed and getting help if needs be
â€¢ DOES include loving you in all your wonderful-mess and doing whatever you can to acknowledge and face those darker emotions in you… dealing with them as self-responsibly as you can… and again, getting help if needs be
This song can remind us of the surge of connection so many felt when it first came out… AND how, right now, it seems like the love is far away when you look at the world stage…
BUT we have grown… we ARE growing collectively and meeting the shadows of human consciousness at a deeper level… it comes to the surface ‘out there’ and ‘in here’ so each of us can play our part, and remember our wholeness as an even greater expression of love.
The air is alive with World Cup fever this month. It’s something that comes around like clockwork, fills the participant nations with high emotion and has the potential to deliver the highest of highs and the lowest of lows.
How, thought I, could I possibly relate this footie-phenomena to the joys of a non-personal perspective in a personal world?
Well, if you’ll pardon the pun, it turns out that it offers us a golden opportunity for self reflection and a shot at deeper freedom…
The other day I caught one of those ‘count down’ TV programmes, the World Cup Top 100 something-or-others, and what I noticed is that we hold distinct national ‘identities’, which directly relate to ‘what we are like’ in the World Cup.
For example – England are rubbish at penalties, Irish fans expect nothing but have the best time, Cameroon are likeable rogues, Germany are efficient and effective; always in contention etc etc.
It’sÂ intriguing that the identification each nation has taken on in relation to their World Cup experience, seems to play itself out again and again. The thing is, the same mechanism is operating in our individual lives; we each have our own ‘World Cup’ event, we have assumed an identity in relation to it, and we play out this identification as our habituated track through the event. With a sigh we are left wondering why it happened pretty much the way it always does.
Of course, if you’re a Brazil, an Argentina or a Germany in relation to your personal World Cup, then chances are you feel pretty happy with how things pan out.
However if you’re an England and find yourself constantly disappointed and longing for the glory days; or if you’re a USA who’s only really interested when you’re winning and dismissive of the whole thing when you’re not; or if you’re a Scotland thatÂ ends up with the opportunity to play much less than you feel you deserve and often end up on the sidelines gaining hollow satisfaction from seeing your ‘only slightly more talented’ sibling country falling flat on their faces again… well then, perhaps, it’s time to break the pattern and have a different experience..?
The Road To Your World Cup Heaven
So, here’s your chance for some self-inquiry. I could call it steps 1-4, but it’s oh-so-much more fun to continue the metaphor:
You’ve gotta be in it to win it, so firstly you’ll haveÂ to get through the qualifying stages. For that you’re going to need to ask yourself what your ‘World Cup’ situation is? Then to survive the group stages you’ll need to knowÂ who you are being in relation to that situation?
Next it’s knock-out time and it’ll take some fancy footwork toÂ uncover which key aspects you’ll need to leverage, to bring more freedom and ease to the situation. Pull all of this off, and you’ll make The Final, where you can use a little NPA (the ‘Pele’ of tools for this kind of thing) and score the winning goal that canÂ reset who you know yourself to be!
Defining Your â€˜World Cupâ€™ Situation
To help get you qualified for the main event, here’s some qualities that define the World Cup and which you can use metaphorically to look at the defining your personal World Cup event:
World Cup Aspects Defined:
Itâ€™s a sport, so there are winners and losers, with a series of events and a distinct outcome that defines that (add drama to taste)!
It is noteworthy on the â€˜sportingâ€™ calendar!
It happens regularly and repeatedly
Thereâ€™s a heavy investment of National identity in it. Lots of fire, passion and potential misery! (even though itâ€™s â€˜onlyâ€™ a sport)
So, to find the World Cup in your life, contemplate those aspects and ponder where this kind of pattern plays out in your life. If you want to sit back and be lead by the hand on this, skip to the bonus resources section and share the blog – then you’ll have access to a handy bendy audio that will help find your personal World Cup.
Who Are You In Relation To That Situation?
Once you’ve got a specific situation in mind it’s time to take an objective look at how it plays out. Imagine that it’s not you, not your family, not your life – just a TV drama. Ask yourself:
How does it usually play out?
What role does my character play throughout? (Think in terms of archetype, stereotypes or symbolically)
What role does my character end up in?
What judgements are my character making?
Is there a clear emotional pathway and/or a switch point? (eg. a give up point, an explosion point, an impatience-leads-to-carelessness point)
Just watch the movie and contemplate these questions, getting a general sense of the role you play and how that pattern shows up.
A Couple Of Examples
Here’s a couple of examples to give you the idea…
The Children’s Clear Up Challenge
Your ‘World Cup’ event might be asking your kids to tidy their rooms? You notice you leave the asking for as long as possible – perhaps its a 4 week cycle. You seem uncharacteristically het up about it and the kids throw all kind of strops. You want to be ‘strong Mum/Dad’ but the tears and tantrums always seem to take the juice from the legs. You hit the crossbar, miss the goal – it never quite seems to go the way you want it. When it comes to this – you just seem to play out the role of the ‘ineffective parent’, and you feel disproportionately crushed.
The Financial Ex-Factor
It’s that time again when you need to ask your ex-husband for more money for the kids. It’s always more of a drama than other conversations you have with him. You find yourself getting nervous before you call him, distrustful thoughts enter your mind, then angry thoughts – you know you play your best game when you’re centred, but you can’t help feeling meek. You fight the feeling and get angry with yourself – you know you’ve a perfect right to ask. Then you call. Sometimes he’s just fine and agrees and what a huge relief. But sometimes there’s a slight hesitation from him, a hint of resistance and you explode – you accuse him of sleight of hand with the finances, you’ve slipped into the role of ‘hysterical ex-wife’, a ‘victim’ – Â it’s an own goal – you’re devastated and bewildered… you don’t even think that stuff… ouch.
And fella’s on the other side of this one – you know there’s equally complex emotions and identities at play here for you too! â™¥
Shifting Identities with NPA
NPA is awesome for shifting identities. The NPA vernacular for them is ‘cookie cutters’ and they come in all shapes and sizes. Simply having an awareness of what you’re up to and the roles you fall into in your personal World Cup is an empowering thing and awareness alone for sure can get things moving. However, super charging with non-personal awareness has a way of releasing these traditionally sticky identities at the speed of light!
So now you’ve got the situation nicely defined, you can apply some NPA, and here’s some simple ways to do that:
4 Steps For Experienced NPA-ers:
1) Use a spew from the set up questions and contemplations in section 1 (the qualifying stage) to get a situational cookie cutter. Self elicit in your preferred way and chooseÂ the most animated cookie cutter. 2) Ask yourself: In relation to [Situational CC], who or what are you being? 3) Spew and elicit the most animated cookie cutter(s) 4) Run those cookie cutters through the NPA Process.
Simple Instructions For Newbies & Beginner NPA-ers:
Simply share this article via the bonus box and you will get access to a 6 min video that will take you through how to do the process. There will also be an outline of the NPA Process words themselves. There’s a ‘gap’ in the process where you insert the cookie cutter you are using.
If you’re a newbie simply use whatever role or roles you came up with that you play as your ‘cookie cutter’.
So in the examples I gave above, the cookie cutter to use for The Children’s Clear Up Challenge would be [ineffective parent]. And for The Financial Ex-Factor, there are two: [hysterical ex-wife] & [victim], requiring two processes. Obviously, it’s going to be whatever role you are seeing yourself in, not the examples. Just put that in the process, say the 6 lines, including those words out loud and see what happens.
If you want to understand all those ‘Experienced NPA-ers’ terms and do really graceful NPA, you’ll need to get some training via our comprehensive audio programmeNPA: The Bridgeor by attending anEvent. You can also get direct assistance from me, and make a huge difference in your lifeHERE.
Bonus Resources For Sharing
I’d love you to share this article on your social networks, and doing so will give you instant access to the NPA Basic Training video, The NPA Process words AND a guided elicitation to help you through steps 1 & 2 described above.
NPA Basic Training
Words For The NPA Process
The NPA Process (c) Joel Young 2007 onwards
Your Guided Elicitation
Hit play and enjoy!
Hi, this is Joel Young, the creator & custodian of NPA. Thanks for sharing the blog. This audio will give you a helping hand to define aÂ situation in life which is your personal world cup. Make sure you’re in a safe place to do this – neither driving nor using heavy machinery. So let’s begin.
Get yourself comfortable and take a deep breath, sigh it out… and as you relax, and allow yourself to contemplate the movie of your day to day life, knowing that the answer will find you, you might wonder what situation, or set of events seems to happen over and over in the same way?
The situation that pops effortlessly into your conscious awareness now, will be one that stands out as somehow important to you. Even though it might seem trivial in the scheme of things, the outcome in this situation inspires a lot of passion â€“ it matters somehow â€“ even if you donâ€™t know why? And it might be something you get very heated about?
Perhaps you notice, that if or when the outcome goes your way â€“ you feel elated. However – if or when the outcome doesn’t go your way â€“ you feel incredibly deflated, or perhaps even furious! You may have noticed that each time this situation occurs, it plays out in much the same way, with perhaps a few minor deviations from the norm?
So, as you relax and allow yourself to contemplate the movie of your day to day life â€“ what situation is coming into your awareness? Be light and open – it’s not an exact science, and doesn’t have to tick every box – just trust that you can work with whatever situation is showing up, or the one you simply decide to pick… When you’re ready, make a note of the situation, a simple reference.
OK, so let’s take it to the next step…
With that specific situation in mind you can now take an objective look at how it plays out. Watch it play out on a screen. Imagine that it’s not you, not your family, not your life – just a TV drama and as it plays out, contemplate what role your character plays throughout. Let the label for the role find you – it can just pop into your mind. It might come as anÂ archetype, like victim, martyr or rebel. It might come as a stereotype like geek, bread winner, drama queen, bully or perhaps as a judgement like dork, big kid, idiot, pathetic person… just be open and trust whatever pops in. Write it down – for newbies – that’s your cookie cutter!
Once you’ve run it through the process, let me know what you experience in the comments and be sure to visit our main site at NonPersonalAwareness.com
Artist credit: World Cup Selfie by Emma Allen – http://www.emmaallen.org/gallery/
We hold distinct national ‘identities’, which directly relate to ‘what we are like’ in the World Cup. via @JoelYoungNPA
It’s intriguing that the identification that nations take on in relation to the World Cup, play themselves out repeatedly. via @JoelYoungNPA
In our individual lives; we each have our own ‘World Cup’ event.Â via @JoelYoungNPA
NPA is The ‘Pele’ of transformational tools :0) Â via @JoelYoungNPA
Score the winning goal that can reset who you know yourself to be! via @JoelYoungNPA
NPA is awesome for shifting identities. via @JoelYoungNPA
Having an awareness of what you’re up to and the roles you fall into is an empowering thing. via @JoelYoungNPA
Non-personal awareness has a way of releasing these traditionally sticky identities at the speed of light! via @JoelYoungNPA
Trust that you can work with whatever situation is showing up. via @JoelYoungNPA
Thought I’d get 2014 rolling with a bit of hard-core spiritual heresy, and happened across some video footage from a panel talk I did with two excellent non-personal friends in Toronto last year.
So, here’s an extract from: “An Evening of Dynamic Conversation on The New Wave of Non-Personal Development”
It’s moderated by Dave Clark (President of the publishing agency – Solutions Inc.), and I was joined by Arnold Timmerman (Author of Leadingship – Exploring the essence of leadership dynamics) and Philip Shepherd (Author of New World, New Self – Coming to our senses in the 21st century).
Arnold & I had talked many times about doing an event like this, and it happened that our schedules coincided in Canada last May. It was a great bonus to be joined by Philip and have an opportunity to offer multiple takes on the non-personal perspective, spirituality and personal development.
Show Me The Heresy…
The particular aspect of heresy we express in this clip, is on the topic of The Ego. We take a look at where the non-personal perspective on it differs from much of the popular personal growth and spiritual dogma that’s fashionable these days.
In this extract the conversation addresses topics like…
What is the nature of our authentic selves and who we think we are?
What is the impact of self inquiry on who we think are?
Does the Ego disappear when you become present?
How does the Ego relate to the human condition and Divinity?
Can you actually get rid of the ego?
What is the mechanism that creates the ego?
What is the mechanism that creates states of enlightenment?
What is the true nature of Unconditional Love?
How does conscious experiencing effect your life’s purpose?
It’s amazing what you can cover in a little over 6 minutes.
Enjoy The Video…
You Can Quote Us…
“When you start self-inquiry, you’ll find that who we are is much more fluid than we think it might be” Arnold Timmerman
“I don’t even think about ‘is my ego involved or isn’t it’ – I want to be fully present and whole” Philip Shepherd
“The minute you start making anything in your experience bad or wrong you instantly step out of the availability of your wholeness” Joel Young